The Ultimate Guide to Stress-Free Haircuts for Your Autistic Child

Hey there, fellow Autism parents! I totally get that the thought of taking your autistic child to get a professional haircut can be pretty daunting. Sensory sensitivities, meltdowns, your child is crying, you're crying....all of it! But don't worry, I've got you covered!

My son is now 5-years old and can happily sit in the salon chair and get his hair cut independently. I'll share with you some tips and tricks that worked for us, and I hope they will work for your kiddo too. Grab your popcorn and drink of choice and get comfy...this is going to be a good read!

Let's turn back time to two years ago...my son, River was 3 years old. River was diagnosed with Autism when he was 2.5 years old and due to his sensory sensitivities, the only way he would allow us to cut his hair was as quickly as we could in the bathtub with these special scissors called Calming Clipper (specifically designed for kiddos with sensory sensitivities).

Depending on how he was feeling that day, he would sometimes let me use this cute little low-noise, waterproof baby hair clipper - which made the job so much faster and easier!

About 6 months later, River began to regress and he no longer allowed us to cut his hair at all...not even comb his hair! I also noticed that his sensory sensitivities seemed to get more intense. He did not like any loud noises at all such as the vacuum or hair dryer. I was extremely disheartened, as I felt like we were just starting to make some progress...and now we were further back than when we started!

So it came to the point where I would have to use the Calming Clipper scissors to cut his hair while he took his nap. It was awful! Trying to maneuver around his head while he slept, hair all over him, hair all over the bed...just hair everywhere! Not to mention the outcome of those sleep haircuts was not a good look!

Even though River's sensory sensitivities were extreme now, I thought maybe a change of scenery would work. I took him to one of those kids salons where they have the fun chairs to sit in (like cars and rocketships), treats, and little iPads attached to the chairs to keep them entertained. My son loves this kind of stuff! Maybe if I just kept him distracted enough, I could hold his ears closed and move his head around while the stylist quickly buzzed his hair. Well, that was a huge FAIL! River was squirming, screaming, and crying the whole time. I ended up sitting him in my lap facing me and just held him while the stylist did what she could to finish his haircut. We both cried the entire time.

When we got home, I did some research, spoke with his Therapy team, and came up with some preparation and a game plan to hopefully make each future visit to the hair salon a little easier each time...for the both of us!

Did my planning and patience work? Check out the video below of River's first successful haircut! Then keep reading and I'll share my plan with you too...

CLICK HERE to see more videos!

Prep Time: Setting the Stage for Success

Use Social Stories and Visual Aids Before the big day, start by introducing your child to the concept of a haircut using social stories and visual aids. Create a simple picture story that walks them through each step, from walking into the salon to the final look. This helps them know what to expect and can ease some of their anxiety.

Play Hairdresser at Home Get some practice in by playing hairdresser at home. Use a doll or family member to mimic a haircut. Let your child pretend to cut hair or sit still while you simulate the actions of a hairdresser.

To make it extra fun (and for extra practice!), we also bought a hairdresser playset so that not only would we use it to play with him, but he could also safely play with the tools himself and get more comfortable with them on his own time. Getting comfortable with the various hairdressing tools beforehand can make the real deal seem a little less scary.

Salon Sneak Peek A few days before the appointment, take your child to visit the salon. Let them meet the stylist and get familiar with the place. The more they know, the less there is to fear.

The barbershop I chose was a few doors down from where my daughter did her taekwondo class twice a week. So one week (twice that week), River and I went next door to the barbershop to say hello to the staff and get familiar with the surroundings. I briefly explained that my son is Autistic, he doesn't speak, and that he has sensory sensitivities to loud noises (buzzer, hairdryer, etc.). They were all so amazing and patient with him! They let him sit in the chair, hold the hairdryer and combs, and gave him lollipops - which he still LOVES and NEEDS every time we go there...they have to be the orange ones though! My son also has been seeing the same barber guy since his very first visit. Keep it familiar and consistent!

Sensory Solutions: Keeping It Comfortable

Pick the Perfect Time Choose a time when the salon is quietest. Fewer people mean fewer sensory triggers, making it a calmer experience for your child.

River and I would go to the barbershop first thing in the morning when they opened. This particular barbershop (the one I mentioned previously) is very busy and does not take appointments, walk-ins only. Because of the amazing Google Reviews I read about the place, and the fact that River was already starting to get comfortable there, I knew this was our place.

Bring Noise-Canceling Headphones The buzz of clippers and chatter can be overwhelming. Have your child wear their noise-canceling headphones into the salon to help block out the noise and keep your child more relaxed. Once it's time to cut their hair, you can turn the headphones upside down (top part under their chin) so that they can still block out the noise. When it comes time to trim around the ears or use the hairdryer, I would quickly take the headphones off and just cover my son's ears with my finger tips to drowned out the sounds.

Comfort Items Are Key Don't forget to bring along a favorite toy or blanket. Having something familiar can provide comfort and security in an unfamiliar setting. River would bring his favorite Buzz Lightyear toy with him, as well as his tablet incase we had to wait a little longer for our tur

Communication: Teaming Up with the Stylist

Brief the Stylist Have a chat with the stylist beforehand. Explain your child's needs and any sensitivities. A little heads-up can go a long way in making the experience smoother for everyone.

My son had already met all of the staff a couple of times on our previous visits and on our first visit, we ended up seeing an awesome guy named Ronnie. He was so kind, calm and patient with River, but was also experienced enough to be able to do a great cut in a very short amount of time! I wouldn't recommend seeing a very new or inexperienced stylist for the simple fact that they likely wouldn't quite have the speed and precision down just yet. With our kiddos, it's all about: how fast can we do this? Will we be happy with the haircut? And, are they patient and kind to my child?

Share the Social Story Show the stylist your social story or visual aids. This helps them understand what your child expects and can make the process a lot easier.

The Big Day: Making It Happen

Positive Reinforcement Rocks Throughout the haircut, use positive reinforcement. Praise your child for every small step, whether it's sitting in the chair or letting the stylist touch their hair. Small rewards can work wonders, so consider bringing a treat or toy for before, during and after the haircut.

Before each haircut, as soon as we walk through the door of the barbershop, everyone sees us and says "Hi River!" He immediately goes straight to the lollipop basket that they have on the waiting room table and grabs his favorite lollipops (the orange ones!) and walks right up to Ronnie's chair and hops in himself! The barbershop also has this cool toy machine where the staff give coins to the kids after their hair cut to get a prize from the machine. This was also something that helped River get comfortable there during our trial visit week and he looks forward to it after every haircut.

Keep It Simple and Calm Communicate clearly and calmly during the haircut. Use simple language to explain what's happening and what's coming next. For example, "Now the hairdresser is going to use scissors. It might feel ticklish, but it won't hurt."

Ronnie was great! He would always communicate with River what he was going to do next and what it would feel like. He would even let River hold the clippers with him to feel the vibration and also lightly blow the hairdryer on low, cool mode on his hands and arms to get a feel of the breeze. At first, I would have to cover River's ears, but now he can tolerate the sounds of the clippers and hairdryer!

Take Breaks If Needed If your child gets overwhelmed, don't hesitate to ask for a break. A few minutes of calm can help them reset and get ready to continue. If your child likes to wear a weighted compression vest, it would be a great idea to wear it to the hairdresser as well - it might just feel like a nice big HUG and provide extra comfort that your child needs.

After the Haircut: Celebrate and Reflect

Celebrate the Win Once the haircut is done, celebrate your child's bravery! Whether it's a high-five, a special treat, or extra playtime, make sure they know how proud you are of them.

Learn and Adjust Reflect on what went well and what didn't. Every child is different, and finding what works best for yours can take some trial and error. Adjust your approach for next time based on your observations.

Wrap-Up

Getting a professional haircut for your autistic child doesn't have to be a nightmare. With some prep, sensory considerations, clear communication, and plenty of positive reinforcement, you can make it a stress-free experience. Remember, you're doing an amazing job, and every small step forward is a victory worth celebrating. Happy haircutting!